Infinity

Regardless of what happens next
The time that we've spent together
Are the happiest memories i could ever ask for
I love you
Not only for who you are
But for who i am when i'm with you.

I LOVE YOU FOREVER AND A DAY! 💓

Thank you

Tq for connecting

Tq for giving me another chance

Tq for continuing to love me

Tq for keeping me in your heart and thots

Tq for putting a smile on my face again

Tq for making me happy once more

Tq for providing me the boost I need in my life

Tq for being here

Tq for just being u

Tq for everything!

LYTHFO. I do. Still.

My weight loss journey

I started my weight loss journey when my physician told me i have hypertension. My BP is as high as 150. She wanted to prescribe medication for me immediately but i refused. So, she said that can only be done if i can lower my BP to below 140 (at least). N in order to do that i have to lose weight n that means i have to change my lifestyle n of coz eating habits. 

My weight at that time was 74kg. Boy was i obese. For my height i need to lower my weight to 57kg to be at normal BMI at least. But to be realistic she said she just wanted me to start losing weight. She will monitor me for the next 6 months. So, dengan penuh azam i promised myself that i will start changing my lifestyle. Saya jenis kalau i put my mind to something, i will do it betul2. My appmt with my doc is another 3 months n by then i lost quite a significant amount of weight. The doc was impressed n the best thing is my BP has lowered to 120+. My doc cakap i'm the living proof that BP boleh turun dengan weight losst. My current weight is 55kg on my good days n 56kg otherwise. I have lost nearly 20kg u alls. Plan to keep it that way. BMI dah normal. BP normal. Blood sugar normal. Kolesterol jahat tu ada sikit borderline. Otherwise i'm a healthy girl (more like makcik. hahaha). At the age of 46 health is wealth.

Ok kalau ada yg curious what i did to lose weight, bacalah tips kat bawah tu ye.

Basic things dlm diet regime sy (The Do’s n The Don’ts):

1. No sugar including condensed milk and all sugary things like cakes, ice cream n chocolates. This is very important coz processed sugar is the main culprit in our diet. If i have to, i subsitute it with honey. For instance when i make coffee at home, i’ll mix the coffee with fresh milk n just a lil bit of honey.

2. Low sodium (this is due to my high BP). I try to minimize the use of salt in my cooking. 

3. Lots of veges. Any type. Not necessarily the green ones. 

4. Selected fruits. Certain fruits have very high sugar level so choose ur fruits wisely. My dietition told me the best fruits are the ones that require u to chew a lot like apples n guavas. 

5. No processed food. Try to eat natural food only. Processed food has very high sodium content. 

6. I take carb in almost every meal but in controlled portion. N sebaiknya guna complex carb. However, i only take rice during lunch. Guna formula pinggan sihat KKM. Suku suku separuh. Suku carb. Suku protein. Separuh veges n fruits. 

7. I do cheat but i don’t do it often. Kena jaga sebab takut kalau selalu cheat nanti susah nk control. But pls do cheat once in a while to satisfy our cravings. Kalau kita rigid sgt nanti susah nk sustain. 

8. No red meat n seafood. Mula2 je. Now i do take red meat tp x selalu n i prefer makan kambing. My protein selalunya consists of fish, chicken, egg n sometimes tempe 😅. 

9. I still take the regular lauk2 but jangan amik banyak kuah. Kalau yg bergoreng, elakkan amik yg bersambal. Kalau nk makan ayam/ikan goreng, amik yg kosong je. Jgn rigid nak makan yg rebus2 or stim2 aje coz nnt cepat fed up n boring n kita akan balik to diet lama. N 1 lg yg penting cuba utk ubah2 menu sbb takut badan kita immune dgn that type of food n x lose weight. 

10. If u have to use oil, use olive oil or coconut oil for healthier option. Tapi kalau nk guna minyak masak biasa pon ok cuma control portion. 

11. Puasa sunat isnin khamis. Kadang2 bukan isnin khamis sahaja sy puasa. Sy puasa bila2 sy rasa nak puasa. Niat je puasa ganti. Boleh tampal mana2 puasa yg mungkin x diterima. This is the easiest way to control our food n calorie intake. Tp masa buka puasa jgn langgar pantang larang pulak ok. Still kena makan ikut portion suku suku separuh. 

12. Jangan skip meal. Kena makan every meal. Take dinner 4 hours b4 bed.

Contoh meals sy- breakfast:omelette or overnight oat or banana smoothie. Lunch:nasi, grilled chicken, sayur. Dinner:roti (canadian purple wheat. Lowest GI) n peanut butter (no added salt n sugar) or banana smoothie. Ni cth menu yg simple2 je. U all boleh buat mcm2 lg menu. 

13. Drink lots of water n drink green tea in the morning masa breakfast. 

14. I don’t take white bread n anything made from white flour. 

15. Exercise. Ni terpulang kepada individu sbb formula utk lose weight is 80% food n 20% exercise. Maknanya jaga makan tu lg penting utk lose weight. Exercise tu is just to boost or enhance the weight loss. Kalau xde masa nk keluar jogging ke apa, boleh buat HIIT or tabata at home. Boleh burn more calories sebenarnya drp jogging. Yg penting buat exercise yg kita suka. Jgn paksa diri nnt kita akan stress n akan stop. Now sy jog n cycle. Kalau x sempat keluar or hujan, sy buat 8mins tabata kt rumah. Try to add variety to ur exercise so that badan kita x immune to that one exercise. 

16. Don’t weigh yourself daily. Timbang 2 minggu sekali cukup. Ini sebab weight kita fluctuate everyday. Kdg2 turun n kdg2 naik. I made this mistake before. Timbang tiap hari pastu stress bila berat x turun n kadang2 naik pulak. Nnt kita akan stress n bila stress berat xkan turun. We’ll be more motivated bila timbang 2 minggu sekali n tgk berat dah turun 2kg cthnya. 

17. Do it leisurely. Makan bila perlu n jgn push yourself too hard.

Harap2 perkongsian sy ni dpt membantu those reading this. Sy bukan expert tp ini cara yg sy buat n it worked. N what i shared bout food tu is being advised to me by a KKM dietition. 

#HHeathealthy #sweatisgood

Soal hati

Ijinkan Aku Menyayangimu - Iwan Fals

Andai kau ijinkan
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Kubuktikan padamu
Aku memiliki rasa

Cinta yang ku pendam
Tak sempat aku nyatakan
Karena kau telah memilih
Menutup pintu hatimu

Ijinkan aku membuktikan
Inilah kesungguhan rasa
Ijinkan aku menyayangimu

Sayangku ooh
Dengarkanlah isi hatiku
Cintaku ooh
Dengarkanlah isi hatiku

Bila cinta tak menyatukan kita
Bila kita tak mungkin bersama
Ijinkan aku tetap menyayangimu

Sayangku ooh
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Cintaku ooh
Dengarkanlah isi hatiku

Aku sayang padamu
Ijinkan aku membuktikan

https://youtu.be/H2StEYDVlc8

My love

U r my ultimate love

U have always been

It never change a bit

Never doubt my love. 

To me u r perfect

I put u on a pedestal

No one comes near 

When i compared them to u.

We lost our chance before

Broken and lost i am without u

But now u r here again

I hope u r here to stay. 

Can’t bear losing u again

The very thought scares me

But i have no power over fate

For now i accept anything u have to offer. 

Come to me my love

For i long for u 

Assure me that you’ll stay

Don’t leave me like u did before. 

Missing u is an understatement

Can’t put my feelings into words

Let me show u how i feel

So that u know i meant everything i said. 

Takdir Allah

Takdir Allah itu hikmah

Takdir Allah itu keajaiban

Ia datang tanpa dijangka

Ia hadir tanpa diduga

Sesuatu yang didambakan akhirnya tiba

Kadang ia bawa kegembiraan

Kadang hadir juga kesedihan

Tapi yakinlah segala perancangan Allah.

Semoga apa yg berlaku ada pengakhiran yang baik

Kita manusia tidak akan tahu 

Jangan pernah berhenti berdoa

Kerana Allah mahu menduga

Sejauh mana kita akan berusaha

Sejauh mana kita akan meminta padaNya.

Serahkan jiwa dan raga padaNya

Hanya Dia yang tahu apa yang terbaik utk hambaNya

Jangan ragu

Jangan khuatir

Sesungguhnya Dia yang Maha Mengetahui.

PadaMu aku berserah ya Allah. 

The Real Gilmore Girls

Pernah tengok Gilmore Girls? 

Gilmore Girls is an American dramedy television series about a single mom, Lorelai Gilmore n her daughter Rory. Lorelai came from a prominent family, got pregnant when she was 16 and went estranged with her parents. She moved to a small town, Stars Hollow in Connecticut and raised her daughter there. She never got married and raised Rory all by herself with the help of her friends n neighbours in Stars Hollow. She n Rory has a bond that is more than mother-daughter. They were best friends. They shared everything with each other n spent most of their time together. 

That is how my bond with Thira is. We are more than mother and daughter. We are best friends. We hang out together, we shop together, we gossip, we fight, we laugh, we do everything together. She is my life. She is my everything. We are the real life Gilmore Girls. 

In the Gilmore Girls, Lorelai never got married, not until Rory was an adult. There was simply no space between them for another person to fit in. They were a tight duo. She dated but never saw the need to have a husband. But when Rory left for college, the urge came. The space is there to let someone in. But still she couldn't settle down n commit herself to a marriage. Lucky for her, Rory went to Yale which was only about 30 minutes from home so they saw each other every week. After a long hiatus, she finally settled down with Luke, Stars Hollow diner's owner n they stayed together for nearly 10 years before they got married when Rory was 32.

Similar to my position, there was simply no space. My priority is of coz raising Thira to the best of my ability n to ensure that she gets the best of everything. The need is there but somehow nothing ever came through. I envy people who find a replacement after a year or so of their divorce. It has been exactly 10 years for me since my divorce in July 2009. Maybe Allah feels that it is not time yet for me. Allah wants me to focus on my only child to see her through school and into tertiary education. Marrying again will mean that i have to divide my time and attention between her and my new husband. She would have felt neglected and left out coz it has always been only me n her since she was little. 

Thira is leaving the nest next year. How am i to survive without her? Am i strong enough to handle my emotions and the feeling of missing her? I feel that i'm losing my best friend. I'm dreading the moment that is happening about a year from now. The space will be there so will there a person to fill in the space? I pray Allah will answer all my prayers.

Allah is indeed the best planner.

Kepada jodoh saya di luar sana, tunggu ye. Mungkin Allah sedang merancang sesuatu yang terbaik dan terindah untuk kita. Saya akan sabar menunggu. Kalau bukan di dunia ini, mungkin kita akan disatukan di sana nanti. See you soon LYTHFO! InsyaAllah. 

Hanya kami yang tahu.